Conflict, A Mindset For Solutions

 A Marital Conflict Is Resolved

Before It Starts!

Imagine the end before your start.  If conflicts usually don’t end well then a new mind set is needed and possibly some help.  The goal in conflict  is always to gain depth of love and respect for your partner.  When couples learn to use conflict for growth, then good things can happen.

Ruth Graham, the wife of the evangelist Billy Graham, was asked a question in an attempt to embarrass her and or her husband.   She was asked if she ever disagreed with her husband .  Her response was golden.

She said, ” If two people agree on everything then one of them is unnecessary”. Often people forget that conflict can bring strength to a relationship, but there must be a certain mindset in order to prevent destruction while the conflict brings growth.

Wrap you partner in words of love !

Words loveRemind yourself these things:

  • STEP ONE,  CONTROL DAMAGING WORDS …Hold yer tongue. The tongue has the power of life and death.
  • Proverbs 18:21

Start with the end in mind.  The goal is growing more in love and respect for your partner.  What is more important, the issue we faced or the way I responded to it? In a year will the issue really matter and will my response leave lasting damage.

There are some whose uncontrolled talk is like the wounds of a sword, but the tongue of the wise makes one well again. Proverbs 12:1

  • Some people seem resilient to words, unaffected, they just let them roll off.  But the truth is that everyone has some point of vulnerability.  Don’t assume anything!Train yourself to know when to stop and take a time out.
  • The start of fighting is like the breaking of a dam: so give up before it comes to blows. Proverbs 17:14Resolve to get rid of bitterness, sharp angry feelings, noise, and unkindness.  Ephesians 4:31


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